Monday, August 13, 2007

Sydney, Flypaper for Freaks.

Sydney,

The Harbour Bridge, Opera House, Bondi Beach....

Freaks.

In the time I have lived in Sydney, it's most notable and defining characteristic has been the sheer concentration of freaks living here. Mind you I live on Oxford Street, have a no less then 3 gay bars within walking distance AND work in promotions. Still, I say, Sydney has a vastly high concentration of unusual and generally strange people.

It all started several months ago...

I was working in a suburb called Chatswood promoting some sort of Tuna - How it is brain food etc, not the point. A guy approached me.

Evan: Hi there!

Man: .......

Evan: Ever heard of Greenseas Tuna?

Man: Ever heard of the Catholic Church?

So I am thinking, oh great, a total nutbar.

What followed was one of the most bizzarre, surreal experiences of my life. Where the man proceeding to explain that everything wrong in the world was the fault of

A) The Catholic Church

B) Muslims

After about 20 minutes of this insanity I tried to end the conversation. I think people must have used my tactics before as his voice got more and more frenzied as I tried to politely get him to go away.

Evan: Sorry, this has been interesting, but, I should get back to work now.

Man: and do you know WHAT ELSE?!?!?! (Voice rising in pitch and volume)

Evan: I'm sure you are going to tell me.

Man: My friend, in WWII, used to travel the islands, garotting the asians.....

Evan: Sure...

Man: (whispering) and do, do, do you know, what else..... he was good...

Evan: Great.

Man: do... do you know what else?!!?!! (getting louder)

Evan: ....

Man: The Pope gets his balls rubbed by his cardinals to make sure he isn't a woman.

Evan: You have to leave, please.


He stayed on. I ended up calling security.

2 comments:

Dijea said...

You gotta love the freaks! Great to see you up and running on the blog. I'll be keeping an eye on it.

gradeschoolrocks said...

Hello cousin evan, Its ethan.